swimming

yesterday, i went swimming. it's hard to be motivated enough to put my body through that, so due to the events of last week/weekend it's been a little while.

but i did it.

swimming is a nice time capsule for me. i haven't really done it since i was a little kid, so memories hit me like a freight train the moment I enter the recplex. memories of being much shorter relative to the lockers. memories of the curious smell of chlorine. memories of being lost in my own little kid imagination world. the years where i simply didn't understand why someone would commit suicide. such a different outlook from now. i even remember the summer after, was it 5th grade? where i'd have my mind on my favorite video game of the time. it was all fun. i was making an overly elaborate site on Dreamweaver that summer. i just loved to tinker around with things.

lolz. life was so fun before middle school.

getting in the water is amazing. every time i rinse off beforehand with hot water, i scold myself because I know the water will feel even colder when I get in there. but really that lasts for about half a second. before i know it i'm flying and it's lovely.

if i had become a swimmer things would have been much different. it's a little late. oh well, music is cool too

just being in the water feels absolutely right. it's like i'm in touch with something much greater. it feels almost like i'm playing music. it's just so sacred.
my very best friend also loves the water and being in the water. our bond is uncanny, and i'm guessing the two are very related.

swimming is one of the few reasons i like being alive :)